In Peanuts, Charlie Brown usually learned by the fourth or fifth time Lucy asked him to punt a football that she was probably going to yank it away seconds before he reached the ball, leaving him to fall on his backside.
Obviously, University of Houston administrators don't mind having sore backsides, because, once again, the school leaders are running to kick the ball into the Athletics Department's court.
If the Board of Regents votes "yes" today, two assistant coaches and a senior associate athletic director are going to receive substantial pay raises.
The Athletics Department claims the raises will help make the UH positions comparable to other schools like Texas A&M and Cincinnati, which have large, if not inflated, athletics budgets.
But then again, their teams are making money by filling their stadiums. For the last three years, UH athletics has not been able to balance its budget, drawing deficits larger than $1 million. Despite this fact, regents and administrators keep pouring money into athletic programs.
To put these proposed raises into context, ask a chemistry professor about the last time he or she was given a pay raise because a chemistry professor at A&M had a larger salary.
Student apathy (or unwillingness to buy a $60 varsity letter sweater) may be one reason behind the department's deficit.
Most UH students find it difficult to squeeze a game in between a one-hour commute and an eight-hour work schedule. Others are more interested in watching wombats mate on the Discovery Channel than seeing a baseball player swing a bat.
Let's face reality. When it comes to sports, some schools just need to sit on the bench.