Groove
to This
Guerra
It was inevitable. After the global success of pop tarts such as the Spice Girls and Backstreet Boys, the endless wave of copycat girl and boy groups have arrived. They bring with them Teen Beat cover looks, cartoonish harmonies and not a single ounce of true innovation or spirit.
While the Spice Girls and Backstreet Boys aren't exactly revolutionary in their own right, each brings an indelible and often irresistible set of items to the table. The Spice Girls thrive on anthems of individuality, and they showcase it with highly distinct personalities and wardrobes and an infectious, in-your-face charm.
The Backstreet Boys are just a slightly updated version of the '80s New Kids on the Block phenomenon, but their clean-cut good looks and frothy harmonies are pleasant-enough radio diversions. C'mon - you know you caught yourself humming one of their songs.
All Saints are marching in first, and with them come Spicy sounds, En Vogue extracts and a couple of off-kilter remakes, all rolled into one hip-pop package.
With the release of their self-titled debut disc, these four not-so-funky divas are already drawing comparisons to that other all-girl Brit outfit. But while the Spice squad thrives on irresistibly catchy choruses, girl-power anthems and highly distinct personalities (not to mention their eternal guilty-pleasure status), All Saints quickly slinks into one indecipherable, tepidly sweet tone.
This isn't a terrible collection of pop tunes, most of which are harmless concoctions penned by the Saints themselves. What's missing here, though, is an edge, even a slight one. The interchangeable vocals soon wear into flat, cotton-candy rhythms - the worst kind for any pop outfit.
"Never Ever" kicks the album off well enough, serving up a solemn, spoken intro that kicks into a junior hip-hop groove. It's hardly a shattering moment, but it's a likable, serviceable song nonetheless.
What trips these chicks up is that precise hip-hop bite they seem to be going for. Songs like "Bootie Call," "I Know Where It's At" and "Alone" simply wither away, thanks to the Saints' ultimately faltering vocals. Distortion effects only serve to highlight the group's limitations.
The big mistakes, though, come in the form of two misguided remakes. "Under the Bridge," the soulful rock hit from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, becomes a semi-sweet soul groove here. It also seems a bit premature for a group that's barely making waves stateside.
There's no excuse for the truly horrendous take on LaBelle's "Lady Marmalade," which becomes a messy blend of raps, rhymes and scratches. Give the original version a listen - it'll leave this anemic overhaul dying in its wake.
While the Backstreet Boys haven't enjoyed the global domination of the Spiceys, they have nonetheless bred imitators. Like the Boys, 'N Sync cut their teeth overseas first, hitting it big with their blend of pop hooks and pseudo-soul (Incidentally, that goes for Spice and Saints as well). With its self-titled debut album, 'N Sync hopes to cash in domestically as well.
Indeed, 'N Sync has the harmonies down, as well as the requisite mention-your-name-in-the-song, self-aggrandizing lyric. ("Here we go/'N Sync has got the flow!") Songs like "Tearin' Up My Heart" and "Here We Go" flow with the most radio-friendly of pop melodies.
The boyz are less successful on droopy ballads like "For the Girl Who Has Everything" and "God Must Have Spent a Little More Time on You," an early entry in the Worst Title of the Year contest. It's here where 'N Sync sounds like a thrift-shop Boyz II Men knockoff.
Euro-beats abound on "I Need Love" and "I Want You Back," the admittedly catchy first single. For the most part, though, 'N Sync is simply another boy group with cute looks and even more precious melodies. When they actually take on something meaningful, like Bread's "Everything I Own," 'N Sync comes off decidedly out of sync. They should leave that cover to Boy George.
If you're looking for truly frilly, unpretentious pop, pick up a copy of one of the Spice Girls' two unabashedly fun releases. You may not engage in deep thinking or analysis, but it will prove a more satisfying pop appetizer than these cheap imitations.