Motivation to escape the shadows
Quiana Pennie
It took me forever to write this article. As the
words formed into sentences on my computer, I kept deleting them because
everything I wrote was extremely lame. I needed the drive and the inspiration
to compel my audience; yet, until yesterday, I had not a single thing to
write about.
Where the hell was my motivation? Did I lose it
during winter break? How could I get my groove back?
It was during my self- interrogation that I decided
to call my boyfriend about this crisis. After pouring on the hysterics,
I asked him what motivates him into accomplishing his goals. His reply
was short and sweet; it fell along the lines of, "I never needed to motivate
myself. If I have something to do, I just do it."
Although he is loving, his seemingly perfect life
sometimes makes mine look like something out of a horribly made B movie
-- as if being a B movie isn't depressing enough on its own merit.
According to Webster's New Standard Dictionary,
to motivate is "to provide with a motive or reason; to act as a reason
for." What was going to be the reason for writing my series of thought-provoking
opinions for the rest of this semester?
Was I going to rant and rave about the usual problems
on campus? Should I write my usual gripes against the national government?
I know these topics have been covered extensively since I took my first
steps onto the campus in 1997, and, frankly, these issues have been written
about one time too many.
I then took it upon myself to think about the
issues and concerns that mattered to me. I thought about the pressures
of trying to succeed in school, and the times I have experienced racism
from others -- even from members of my own race.
I thought about the numerous discussions my friends
and I have had about the struggles of being black in America, and how I
have been sexually harassed by many ignorant boys disguised as men.
Thinking about these issues and experiences brought
ranges of emotion from anger to awareness. I knew I wasn't the only woman
who has experienced these situations, and I also knew that some of these
topics have not been discussed as often as the rest.
These experiences began to fuel the passion in
me to write about them because they seem to have become taboo in our society.
I believe these topics will inspire my audience
to form opinions about them because, no matter how many times public figures
try to push them aside, these issues still affect our country, our society,
and our schools.
This was when I found my reason to write ... my
motivation.
