Term 'tax credit' gets
a new meaning
Randy Woock
Taking someone's money against his or her
will is typically known as theft, unless you work for the Internal Revenue
Service, in
which case it is called "taxation."
Tax time's coming. Time for you to pay
the Man like the sharecropping bunch of peasants you all are. Why should
you pay your
taxes? Why give up between 17 and 30 percent
of the funds you wasted your year slaving away for?
Well, you remember the bullies in grade
school or junior high who'd steal your lunch money, right? Remember what
they'd do if you
refused to cooperate? That's right, it
was a sound and supreme butt-kickin' that was sent your way. It is the
same basic idea with the
government and your taxes, except the
bullies never pretended they needed your money to help you. They did not,
in addition to
taking your money, attempt to control
the rest of your life with rules and regulations. In other words, along
with being their victim they
didn't feel the need to make you their
slave.
Sure, you could point out useful things
your tax dollars go to — things like roads and schools and other social
services. Very useful
things, all of these, and all together
they comprise, at most, 15 percent or so of your tax dollar. The other
85 percent or so goes to
purchasing weapons to kill dark-skinned
people on the other side of the globe, corporate welfare, supporting bloated
bureaucratic
structures, funding despotic regimes and
paying law enforcement agencies to harass and monitor your worthless, peasant
self.
It's obvious that the whole purpose of
government is to take as much of your money as possible while spending
as little of it back on
you as it can. Hence the fact that no
matter what promises they make to the collective sheepdom of America during
elections, every
president in the last 30 years has raised
taxes while slashing social services — every single one.
They've all decreased social services (i.e.,
the programs that do the unthinkable act of spending your money on you)
while
increasing the war — I mean "defense"
— budget.
And if that's the way it's going to be,
fine. Great. If my tax dollars are going to be used to protect American
oil interests overseas —
whoops, I mean "spread democracy" — while
supporting the police state that monitors me here, so mote it be.
But at the very least I want credit for
it. No more anonymous donations to the "American murder machine" for this
proud citizen; if my
taxes are going to pay for guns, ammunition
and other death-dealing pieces of ordinance, then I want people to know
where their
wounds are coming from. I want ammunition
belts with each bullet on them marked, "Your son's life taken courtesy
of the tax dollars
of Randy Woock."
Maybe there could even be smiling pictures
of my ugly mug adorning land mines and other anti-personnel devices. That
way, when
some hapless civilians accidentally get
their legs blown off, they know exactly who's responsible.
Give credit where credit's due. If PBS
can mention the names of its major sponsors on the air, then I want the
world to know that all
the dead and maimed Afghan children couldn't
have occurred without the proper funding from yours truly.
And hey, maybe we can get corporate funding
in on this unique advertising idea. Imagine yourself in some mud and brick
village in
Asia. Everyone looks up upon hearing a
strange whistling sound, and the last thing you and your family see is
a cruise missile
headed straight for you, bearing on its
side something as universally recognizable as the Golden Arches...
Don't let the politicians fool you with
their finger-pointing at welfare and other social services as to where
your tax dollars go. The vast
majority of them head straight into the
coffers of military contractors to help kill and subjugate people around
the world. And I'm cool
with that, so long as we all get the credit
we have coming to us, because none of this would be possible without your
support.
So don't forget to pay your taxes.
