Arts & Entertainment

The king is dead, but Jesus lives on

Gibson's graphic Gospel tale sweeps box office at No. 1

Box Office Report

John Seaborn Gray

Well, it's finally happened. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King has disappeared from the top 10 after a long, successful run, and a new release has dethroned the top movie of the last two weeks. Aren't you excited?

Debuting in 10th place, Broken Lizard's Club Dread was responsible for booting LOTR from the big 10. Does anyone understand the whole "Broken Lizard" thing? Isn't its icon a monkey? What's the symbolism here?

Barbershop 2 fell to ninth place, and looked ready to drop out of the top 10 as well. Welcome to Mooseport dropped like a rock, down four places into eighth this week. Not surprising for a minor studio effort that gathered some of the worst reviews so far this year. I guess not everybody loved Raymond. 

Eurotrip was down to seventh place this week. Buffy the Vampire Slayer fans should feel plenty dirty at this one, marveling at what an attractive young woman Michelle Trachtenberg became. Ah yes, feel the shame. 

Sticks-and-pucks saga Miracle is still doing well in sixth place, proving that plucky Americans will beat their enemies whether they be Soviet Olympic teams, or dwindling box office returns.

Inexplicable prequel Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights debuted in fifth this week. Not only is it totally devoid of the chemistry shared between Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey, but it's also missing the classic line, "No one puts baby in a corner!" Also, the movie, like its predecessor, is rated PG-13. So, really, how dirty could it be? Such a let-down. 

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen is still emasculating preteen boyfriends everywhere in fourth place. Imagine you're 13, and your girlfriend wants you to take her to see this movie. It might actually be sufficient reason to never speak to her again. 

Quick. Ashley Judd plays a woman who has been wronged and now needs the help of an older man to make things right. Which movie is this? If you said Twisted, debuting in third place, you'd be right. Of course, you'd also be right if you said Kiss The Girls, Double Jeopardy or High Crimes. Might be time to branch out a little, Ash. 

Knocked to second place, 50 First Dates is still doing good business. Why not see it again? You can never see too much walrus vomit. That's one of the oldest sayings in the book. 

Speaking of "the book," Mel Gibson's ultra-violent chronicle of the last 12 hours in the life of Jesus, The Passion of the Christ, shot to No. 1 by a large margin, earning $117 million cumulative gross. It earned $76 million on its first weekend in wide release, which beats out the second place movie's earnings by more than $60 million. 

It's a movie for the whole family, assuming your family enjoys scenes of flesh-ripping. Leave the kids at home. They can see it when they're older.

Gray writes the weekly box office summary. 
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