Arts & Entertainment
 

'Cellar Door' leads to folk rock bottom

Vanderslice's latest album offers tedium and immaturity

By Bridget Brown
The Daily Cougar

Nearly 60 years ago, accomplished writers were asked which phrases they considered the most beautiful in the English language. "Cellar door" was said to have the most musical combination of sounds in the entire language. Songwriter John Vanderslice took a cue from the experts and named his new record after the perfect phrase -- Cellar Door. But pleasing sounds are scarcely found in the 12 tracks of whiny, overly dramatic folk rock.

The songs are littered with organs, church bells and timpani drums under tales of lost characters. There's the guy who steals his mom's television and hocks it for drug money on the song "When It Hits My Blood." There's a song about a tortured soul who moves in with his mom and gets struck by lightning on "June July." Don't forget the guy who was born into a mob-like family and knocked up his girlfriend on "They Won't Let Me Run" or the usual lonely babble of "My Family Tree."

Vanderslice is a storyteller -- or at least he tries to be. The problem is that his stories just aren't interesting enough, and there isn't a single concept that links together any of the songs, which would improve the flow of the album.

Many of his visions are off-the-wall occurrences meant to be eccentric and intriguing, but even the violent imagery of the war tale "Heated Pool and Bar" isn't enough to hold the listener's attention. The slow-motion acoustic guitars don't help his cause. Vanderslice's timing is the only element that keeps the record rolling. 

His singing, though extremely whiny, is competent if unspectacular. 

Instead of getting a brief look into the twisted lives of strangers on Cellar Door, the listener ends up confused and bombarded with the nonsense of an over-imaginative songwriter who would be better off writing novels instead of music.

John Vanderslice

Cellar Door

Barsuk Records

The verdict: Hey Vanderslice -- stick with a concept.

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