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Opinion

'B-word' takes new meaning after 30

Mubaraka Saifee
Opinion Columnist

My 13-year-old finally got us to buy him an iPod Nano. My 5-year-old has been in India with her grandmother for three months and still says she doesn't want to come home yet. And now my 2-year-old, instead of looking sorry when I scold him, replies with an emphatic ‘Bad boy Mommy!' Am I getting old or what? Am I no longer, the cool, hip mom that everyone else wished they had? What happened, and when?

Lately, I've had this gnawing feeling at the back of my mind that maybe I am getting old. This typically happens to me when it's "that" time of the year. You know, the b-word. Yes, it's my birthday. I'll finally be reaching the big 3-0, or something in that approximate range, give or take a decade. I started college in 1997, and it's been almost 10 years and I still don't have my bachelor's! It's all these little things like forgetting to turn in an assignment on time, or forgetting to study a particular chapter for a test. When my 7th grader does that, I say it's because he's young and irresponsible. When I do it, it's because of my old and fading memory cells.

Then there's the gift factor. Before, I used to get fresh red roses or pieces of jewelry. Last year, I got a bamboo plant. The excuse? The roses will die in a week or two, but the bamboo plant will live forever! What actually happened? Two of the stems yellowed and dried up within six months, and the third one was transported to the fishbowl via life-flight to see if the nitrogen compounds could possibly save it from the same dire fate. I'm happy to report that so far, it's in stable condition. Valentine's is no better. I now have to wait an extra day for the chocolates because the same box is 50 percent off the day after, and why waste good money?

And then there's the dinner factor. Last time, we went out to a fancy steakhouse. We had been looking forward to it for days. One look at the menu, and I realized I very well might not even be getting a present at all after this. This year, I suggested we get some steaks on sale at Kroger and have a barbecue in our back yard. And I even know what my gift is going to be: a brand new set of barbecue utensils I've been wanting for a long time. But the real present is going to be the fact that for one evening I'll get to relax while my husband does the cooking. Oh yes, it is going to be a happy birthday after all.

Saifee, an opinion columnist for The Daily Cougar, 
can be reached at mubaraka_saifee@yahoo.com.